Where am i?

[baby_gal_1714]

I was walking down the rows of books in my uncles library, skimming my fingers along the spines of the books. I had read all the books in the library, but it never hurt to reread anything. So i kept walking until i notice that there was hidden book. Standing up behind a row of books was a think book covered in vines. I reached my hand behind the row of books to grab the vine covered one. It had no words on the cover but it was thick. So I grabbed it and walked to my guest room in my uncles house. I climbed onto my bed and opened the book only to discover that it was blank. So much for the new book, i thought. I didn't want to walk all the way back to the library, so i blew out my candel and fell asleep. Only to be awaken fifteen minuets later to vines crawling up my legs. I kicked and bucked tyring to tear the vines off of me. But my attempts to get them off were usless. It was a lost cause and soon the vines covered my head, and i was surrounded in darkness.

Ok.... This story does involve Vampires and love but tell me if you like it and if i should keep going.

[zippythewild]

may i critique?

first sentence should be more mysterious, it bores the reader. When a story starts boring, write it out of order... something more like, "The moment I found it I knew that it was old. Vines were growing all around it's binding and it smelt of dust. I had been walking through my uncle's library....." This get's the reader wondering more. You need more description. I don't even know the size of your uncle's library.

I love the crazy vines, very original, I didn't see it coming at all. You should improve and continue, good luck

[baby_gal_1714]

Yea, i know but the begining was really long so i cut off about 20 pages to get to the vine part because thats where it really starts to get good. Sooo..... back to the good part.....

The vines wound tighter, and tighter around my body. I tried to use my arms and nails to ripe apart the vines, but it was impossible. I lied still as the vines continued to get tighter. Soon i lost consciousness, weither to lack of air or me just fainting, i had no idea... My eyes sping open, the second i woke up. I was no longer in my gues room, but a forest. It was dark and there were trees everywhere. I slwoly sat up to find a slight ringing in my ears. As i continued to look around it seemed that i was in the middle of the forest. No matter which way i looked, i saw nothing but trees and grass. I carefully got up to my feet and walked to the nearest tree. I leaned against it as i started to think my situation through. 1.I was in a forest 2.I had no food. 3.I only had the clothes that i wore. 4. i had absoutly..... crack I whipped my head around to see what had made that noise. My eyes came to rest on a man. He was tall and pale. His eyes were a mixture between brown and black. His hair was jet black and secured at the nape of his neck. He was very muscular and looked every part of a greek god. Then he spoke and it was like a million angels singing, "Who are you?"

[zippythewild]

but... may i critique or not?

[baby_gal_1714]

Yes, go ahead and critique.......seems like your the only person who will do it honestly! So thank you for all you have to say ahead of time